Not Now
by That-Fresh-Rain-Smell
Summary: He didn't know which one of them was dying, but it fet like both. it was both. Songfic, Not Now, Blink182


_Not Now_

A/N: Inspired by blin-182's Not Now, please listen to it because it makes the story better because it's just….perfect. And yes this is a snarry (what isn't these days? lol)

* * *

_Come here_

_Please hold my hand lord now_

_Help me_

_I'm scared please show me how_

_To fight this_

_God has a master plan _

_and I guess_

_I am in his demand_

_Please save me_

_This time I've gotten nothing_

_And you'll see_

_You win, this is done_

_And now I _

_Have come to realize_

_That you are_

_The one who snuck behind._

_Please stay_

_Until I'm gone_

_I'm here hold on_

_To me_

_I'm right here_

_Waiting_

_I see_

_My life _

_It feels good_

_In outcome_

_That's you_

_Just like you would_

_It's useless_

_My name is made for this_

_And I win_

_One last chance_

_Please stay_

_Until I'm gone_

_I'm here hold on_

_To me_

_I'm right here_

_Waiting _

_And take_

_My one last breath_

_And I'm for dead_

_That I will be right here_

_Waiting_

_Please stay_

_Until I'm gone_

_I'm here hold on_

_To me_

_I'm right here_

_Waiting_

_And take_

_My one last breath_

_And I'm for dead_

_That I will be right here_

_Waiting_

_Please stay_

_Until I'm gone_

_I'm here hold on_

_To me_

_I'm right here_

_Waiting_

_And take_

_My one last breath_

_And I'm for dead_

_That I will be right here_

_Waiting_

* * *

_Gods he was really dying._

_Gone._

_He couldn't be sure, of course, which one of them way dying, but did it matter? It felt like both. It was both._

He lay in the dark, almost black grass under a starless sky in a desolate forest, his mind wandering. The large battle that had just taken place—and ended the war—was the farthest thing from his mind.

_Shallow breathing—mine or his? Gone, gone. Going leaving gone. _

His hand grasped roughly around the others as he tried to think.

_Come here_

_Please hold my hand lord now_

_Help me_

_I'm scared please show me how_

_To fight this_

Fight? He wasn't sure how. All he knew was that this man, the one whom he had cried over, killed for, lived for, and now, died for, might possibly be dying. The man who, in no respect, had returned his affections. The man who hated him, loathed him, with such a passionate fury it was beautiful.

_Where what why…The only time…Which one of us…?_

The one time they had ever been more than grudging allies was a night quite like this, some time ago.

_Heat, incredible, immeasurable heat. Warmth beyond belief. Passion, or something like it. Pleasure. So much more than that…_

His mind swam with the memory, clung to the idea that this man was not just who he seemed, did not feel what he said to feel.

_Please save me_

_This time I've gotten nothing_

_And you'll see_

_You win, this is done_

_Done, done. The other had won, they had both died, still enemies, grudging allies. _

_And now I _

_Have come to realize_

_That you are_

_The one who snuck behind._

_Oh gods, no. No. was it…? Could it…?_

Images flashed through his mind in rapid succession, a memento of the Dark Lord he had just defeated.

Snape. _Him_. The man beside him. Snape, handing off information to the Dark Lord, Snape, _his side, his side._

_No no no no no. _

His hand grasped tighter to the others, their breathing in unison, still a hazard guess as to who was dying and who was not.

_Please stay_

_Until I'm gone_

_I'm here hold on_

_To me_

_I'm right here_

_Waiting_

His eyes were closed now, his grip less firm. His mind swirled with an inky blackness that blocked all thought, all pain, all coherency to every degree.

_I see_

_My life _

_It feels good_

_In outcome_

Hazy thoughts were lazily swimming through the darkness around his mind.

_The means did justify the end._

_That's you_

_Just like you would_

_Of course. It was Snape. He's bound to do it. In the end things all turned the same._

_It's useless_

_My name is made for this_

_And I win_

_One last chance_

_He had been born to die, and he had died winning._

_Please stay_

_Until I'm gone_

_I'm here hold on_

_To me_

_I'm right here_

_Waiting _

_And take_

_My one last breath_

_And I'm for dead_

_That I will be right here_

_Waiting_

As he slipped away, he felt the man beside him begin to fall into the unknown, and he smiled. They were both dying, yes. But they had now been together a second time. This was the last time. The last time together. But oh, it was beautiful.

_Please stay_

_Until I'm gone_

_I'm here hold on_

_To me_

_I'm right here_

_Waiting _

_And take_

_My one last breath_

_And I'm for dead_

_That I will be right here_

_Waiting_

* * *

A/N: totally random….too tired to tell if this was good or not, but the song is so perfect, it makes up for any horrible-ness.

Review?


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